Please dont say these to me, hopefully NEVER

I don’t take 100% offence to these sentences but I wish I can hear less of these:

I’m going to use Mary as the name in my examples.

1. Do you know Mary is pregnant ?
   No I don’t. And even if I do, I don’t need anyone to tell it to me twice or thrice. Also, why would I wanna know?! It is not me being pregnant, why would I want to know right?! So don’t tell me who is pregnant because, I don’t want to know.
2. Don’t worry, infertility is getting common these days! Mary has it too!
   So? Seriously? Suck my toes. So what if it is common? Does it mean I should be part of the statistics? And, I don’t want to be common! And no, stop thinking that Mary should be part of the journey too.
3. Mary stopped trying naturally/gave up IVF and then got pregnant naturally.
   I’m sorry, I am not getting your kind intentions here: are you trying to tell me to give up on trying and try to waste time watching to see if I will get lucky and get pregnant?! Sorry I’m just not a lucky draw person. I never win. Good for those who got pregnant after failed IVF or multiple tries at natural but the keyword here is, I have not given up YET. So don’t tell me who has stopped what.
4. Why don’t you try another round of IVF? You know, Mary tried a few times and got it the last time.
   Why don’t you try to grow another kidney? Why don’t you try to grow more brains? Really, an IVF costs loads of money and you would be lucky if you are on a short protocol. Saves on drugs, scans and consults but still, a hefty sum. Furthermore, its a lot of hormones to be introduced to the body, poking of ovaries, needles sticking you to put you to unconsciousness! Its lot to handle physically and mentally and it is not easy at all. It takes a lot of strength and courage for an individual to decide if they should push forward to go for another round. So I will decide if I should go for another round.
5. Relax, you are still young! Mary still got pregnant when she was over 40, its a miracle!
   I dont know how many god forbidden times I have reemphasize that I am not young anymore!! I am 34 this year and I have been TTC for 4 years. In fertility’s age and a race against time with no guaranteed success, I am an aging freak. No offence to anyone but, I really wish I don’t have to be a mum at only 40. So please. Stop saying this to me.
6. Well, at least you have a good life right now.
   And I am grateful for it really. I have a good job, great boss, great colleagues, great family, 2 wonderful fur cat babies and a appreciative hubby. I am not complaining about my life, or his life or their life or life in general. I am specifically saying I have a specific problem, which is my infertility. I hate the way it is but I am doing all I can to go around my issue by doing IVFs. I really want to start a family so, please, I know I have a good life but I have other problems to handle too.
7. Mary doesn’t have any kids either. I think she is doing ok.
   Poor Mary. She is ok with it but it doesn’t mean she is not SAD! Do you know what is she really feeling inside? No you don’t and you will never do. It is a void that is unable to fill regardless how much you try to fill your life with other activities. It is something that will follow through with you for the rest of your life.  I am sad, broken and honestly, I am not THAT ok. So don’t judge others with me nor try to make it feel that it is ok without kids. Because, it is probably not. People are just trying to deal with that feeling or void. I may be wrong, but at least this is what I feel now.

I know I may sound critical and psychotic but at least that’s how I feel right now. Sighs…